But Marjorie…

Marjorie, you read that wrong.

How can I read it wrong?

That green sludge will NOT cure the flu.

Britt, it says so right here.

Where?

On this site.

What site?

Something called The Secret Life of Celery.

Show me.

Marjorie, that is not the site. Where did you get this link?

From one of my friends in the Better Living Through Greens group?

Friend? What friend? Do you know this person?

Well, no but she is my friend in the group.

How do you know it is a she? What is it called, the Better Living Through Green Goop?

HA. HA. Smart guy.

Look here, Marjorie, the group creator is a wacko. Look at all this stuff. He is a real nut job. Who is this guy? He looks older than dirt. Never mind. What are you going to do with it?

I am going to drink it.

Where did you get it?

From the Natural Foods store.

Well, okay. I am guessing it is safe if it is readily available.

Why wouldn’t it be safe?

Marjorie, they have people in the emergency room because they were convinced drinking bleach would cure the flu. People will do anything.

Are you saying I am dumb enough to drink bleach?

NO! What I am saying is… You have to be careful. Have you tried it?

Not yet.

Well?

Okay.

Well?

Uh… Um… it doesn’t taste like bleach.

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Written: March 23, 2020
Words: 238